No titties today just some funny quotes from around the internet

FOR THOSE OF US WHO HAVE BEEN FEELING LESS THAN STELLAR IN THE BRAIN DEPARTMENT, TAKE HEART FROM THE FOLLOWING INSPIRING WORDS OF WISDOM

or

TRY THINKING BEFORE SPEAKING YOU TOWEL !

Well no titties today just some funny quotes from around the internet, it was gonna be some inspiring and cheerful quotes but then i found these and thought they were better !

Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?

Answer: "I would not live forever, because we would

not live forever, because if we were supposed to live

forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot

live forever, which is why I would not live forever."

- Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest



"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids

all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd

love to be skinny like that, but not with all those

flies and death and stuff."

- Mariah Carey



"Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces

some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana.

The researchers also discovered other similarities

between the two, but can't remember what they are."

- Matt Lauer on NBC's Today show, August 22



"I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to

comply with the law."

- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes.



"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very

important part of your life."

- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign



"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part

of my body."

- Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward



"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the

lowest crime rates in the country."

- Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC



"We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees."

- Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks



"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through

our papers. We are the president."

- Hillary Clinton commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents



"China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese."

- Former French President Charles De Gaulle



"That low down scoundrel deserves to be kicked to

death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it."

- A congressional candidate in Texas



"I don't feel we did wrong in taking this great

country away from them. There were great numbers of

people who needed new land, and the Indians were

selfishly trying to keep it for themselves."

- John Wayne



"Half this game is ninety percent mental."

- Philadelphia Phillies manager Danny Ozark



"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment.

It's the impurities in our air and water that are

doing it."

- Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle



"Without censorship, things can get terribly confused

in the public mind."

- General William Westmoreland



"If you let that sort of thing go on, your bread and

butter will be cut right out from under your feet."

- Former British foreign minister Ernest Bevin



"I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix."

- Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle



"The private enterprise system indicates that some

people have higher incomes than others."

-Gerry Brown



"It's no exaggeration to say that the undecided could

go one way or another."

-George Bush, US President



"I have opinions of my own-strong opinions-but I

don't always agree with them."

-George Bush, US President



"Not only is he ambidextrous, but he can throw with

either hand."

-Duffy Daugherty, football coach and sports analyst



"We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean

air do we need?"

-Lee Iacocca



"Please provide the date of your death."

-from an IRS letter



"I was provided with additional input that was

radically different from the truth. I assisted in

furthering that version."

-Colonel Oliver North, from his Iran-Contra testimony



"We are sorry to announce that Mr. Albert Brown has

been quite unwell, owing to his recent death, and is

taking a short holiday to recover."

-Parish Magazine



"Men, I want you just thinking of one word all

season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl."

-Bill Peterson, football coach



"Hawaii is a unique state. It is a small state. It is a

state that is by itself. It is different from the

other 49 states. Well, all states are different, but

it's got a particularly unique situation."

-Dan Quayle, US VP



"Be sure and put some of those neutrons on it."

-Mike Smith, Baseball pitcher, ordering a salad at a restaurant



"We are not without accomplishment. We have managed to

distribute poverty equally."

-Nguyen Co Thatch, Vietnamese foreign minister



"The word 'genius' isn't applicable in football.

A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."

-Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback and sports analyst



"I've read about foreign policy and studied-I

know the number of continents."

-George Wallace, 1968 presidential campaign



"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude

certain types of people."

-Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor



"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."

-Dan Quayle



"We are ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur."

-Dan Quayle



"The road of good intentions is paved with Hell."

-Spencer Ante



"Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas."

-Keppel Enderbery



"The loss of life will be irreplaceable."

-Dan Quayle



"The people in the Navy look on motherhood as being

compatible with being a woman."

-Rear Admiral James R. Hogg



"We apologize for the error in last week's paper in

which we stated that Mr. Arnold Dogbody was a

defective in the police force. We meant, of

course, that Mr. Dogbody is a detective in the police

farce."

-Correction Notice in the Ely Standard, a British newspaper



"If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack

in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor

their heart throughout the night. And the next

morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record."

-Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman



"Caution: Cape does not enable user to fly."

-Batman Costume warning label

Ok maybe I just can't resist so heres a few anyway lol

Latest hot single or just plain horny english girls !

So heres my pick of the bunch i found whilst browsing all these girls are friendly and for real i can confirm after chatting to them.

Lady_Muck, 32 in WORTHING
Status: Single • Orientation: Straight • Looking for: Fetish
As you can see my tits are my best assett. Why not come and let me smother you with my fleshy bust and large nipples ready for sucking.

Someone a bit younger perhaps ?

A fun and flirty brommie girl.

Flirty_girlie, 21 in BIRMINGHAM
Status: Single • Orientation: Bi-curious • Looking for: No-strings Naughty Fun!
I'm an attractive,flirty, intelligent blonde that likes having fun and exploring. I am adventurous and am open to single, group, or couple fun. Am looking for people of like minds of any nationality.

Sammie really is a sweet heart but dont let that decieve you she can be a real dirty slut ( sorry sammie i dont mean it !)

suductivesammie, 38 in EGHAM
Status: Married • Orientation: Bi-curious • Looking for: No-strings Naughty Fun!
hi, im a 38 year old highly sexed lady thats looking for a toyboy aged 20-25ish to satisfy my needs. send me a pic (the naughtier the better!) and we'll take it from there.awaiting your reply x

Nice girl quite young and full of energy she like to be dominated a bit too much for me but a real woman with some great assets, thanks for the pics Hale

hailesabove, 20 in BUCKHURST HILL
Status: Single • Orientation: Straight • Looking for: Discreet Relationship
Hi i am haley i m a student so cant be bothered with a relationship i am pretty busty and into oral sex i get very turned on by strangers i want shagging every night and like to be submissive so you can use me and abuse me (within reason)

Sexy flirty girl a bit shy at first but hey i kinda like a challenge !

Flirty Girl, 29 in ASHINGTON
Status: Single • Orientation: Straight • Looking for: No-strings Naughty Fun!
luv to flirt and have fun with guys of all ages. cum and flirt with me and see if you can turn me on enough!

Well thats it for me for a bit remember to check out these girls and say towlie says hi ;) although i am not sure if this is a good idea or not lol.

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